Rogue squirrels exist!

My Dad had a violent rogue squirrel in his back yard menagerie. He watched it chase the birds and bully the other squirrels, all the while doing a slow burn. One day a wood duck entered the D.U. wood duck nesting box installed on one of his trees. He then saw the rogue squirrel follow it in. A noisy ruckus ensued. All went silent and the squirrel emerged from the box, literally bathed in blood. It was the proverbial straw. My Dad immediately fetched my 10/22 and dispatched the troublesome nut muncher. Serenity was restored to the back yard eco-system.

A forensic study of the wood duck box turned up multiple dead bird pieces and parts in various stages of mummification. My brother joked about the sociopathic squirrel building an altar with mementos, newspaper clippings, candles and shards of broken mirror but Dad was not amused.

A related and more recent story. My Dad did a slow burn over the course of months watching a horny male guppy that tirelessly pursued his female tankmates. According to him he never gave them a moments rest. My Dad is old school and does not tolerate perversion or condone promiscuous behavior. About the fourth or fifth time I heard the story of the randy guppy it ended with his capture and release to the wilds of the local sewer system.

Fin, feather and fur beware, he is watching.